This article was written by ASFL Local Coordinator, Ibewuike Donald Chike.

To begin, when I speak of women being traded, I mean in marriage. Now I can almost see the traditionalists with trailer tyres over their heads and jerrycans of fuel in their hands, waiting to roast me and my “fancy” article in a grand pyre, but, I will appeal to their humanities (and to yours also), for them (and you also) to join me to realistically and in a humane manner, subject this matter to scrutiny. As it seems like the marriage system in Africa is the market where the liberties of women are being traded under the mercies of the market forces of culture.

Not to denigrate the concept, but, marriage has a lot of similarities with business transactions like leveraged buyouts (LBO’s) and hostile takeovers. After such transactions, new names emerge like in the case of Standard Chartered. In the same vein, after marriage, name changes or additions usually occur. The major differences between both are that one; marriage is (or at least should be) between two or more individuals excluding any externalities, and two; the contractual agreements in marriage do not (or at least should not) involve any kind of coercion.

That being explained, let us look critically on the African marriage institution. Africa is deeply rooted in cultural beliefs which is not necessarily malevolent. Now culture has been defined as a way of life by many, but I will simply define culture as society’s habits. So as an individual can possess “bad habits” (by bad I mean habits that harm other individuals), I believe a society can possess “bad habits” (habits that harm societies or individuals that interact within or with that society). Cultures like the respect of the young for the elderly, are beneficial to society as their partial absence in Europe is somewhat responsible for many societal ills there. However, most cultures surrounding our marriage institution in Africa are not beneficial to us, and desperately intrude on the personal liberty of individuals (especially women). Let us examine them carefully.

First; the bride price. Now if this culture had a more amenable name, I might have been less animous towards it. The idea of a human being having a “price” is absolutely absurd. To put a price on something means you own it. No one can claim to own a human being!!! Except the individual himself. Now though culturists claim that it is merely a tradition and does not indicate sale, I beg to differ, as in most cultures; no bride price, no marriage; and even in cases where there is concession by the family of the bride, the father has to give consent. Also families have even been known to turn down grooms on the basis of financial affluence (they seem to be looking for the highest “bidder”). This is offensive to the couple on many counts. First, and most importantly, a bride is not for sale. Be it half sale, full sale, or any other term applicable or associable with this scenario. Next, these “bride prices” are sometimes so exorbitant that grooms even run into debt to pay them and in some cases have been known to even forsake a potential spouse because they cannot “afford” her, and even when they can, there is always the possibility of them itemizing a wife. I am not trying to justify woman brutality or masculine oppression of any sort, but, a man who had his wedding surrounded by such fiscal “policies” may have room to entertain such thoughts.

Furthermore, women (or in some cases, even young girls) are forced into marriages against their wills by their parents based on cultures of early betrothal or arranged marriages (in South Eastern Nigeria), and, forced marriages (in Northern Nigeria). This is a violation of the human rights of these individuals and is akin to slave trade. People should be free to marry whosoever they want, as long as they are in agreement.

Finally, it is a myth that cultures are unchangeable; cultures do not define people, people define cultures. It (culture) is the generally accepted habit (practice) by society, and much like an elected government official, it can be voted out. Let us therefore, not allow our culture become an “oppressive government” restricting our own freedom and that of our loved ones with its “nationalistic policies” of cultural demands. Let us say no to the “monopoly” of traditionalistic ideals of parents insisting on choosing spouses for us. Slave trade has long been abolished; it is past high time we lift the banners high that say, ”Our Women Are Not For Sale”.